Just wondering if anyone out there gets along in perfect harmony with their significant other, spouse or mate (husband or wife) at all times? Just a note here. I read that years ago someone asked Billy Graham’s wife if she ever got mad or irritated with her husband to the point she considered divorce. Her reply was, “Divorce, no…murder, yes.”  I had to laugh at that.  My case in point here is that no matter how much you love your “mate,” there are bound to be times that you are totally furious and/or disgusted with him/her. Trust me. This is just normal. There was a program on T.V. recently where a wife stated that after fifty years of marriage there were plenty of times that she felt she was totally out of love with her husband, only to rebound to being totally in love with him. I understand. I was somewhat ticked off at my husband recently over the fact that he would forget to do something that meant a lot to me even though I had reminded him several times over several months. I was stewing over it but decided to sit down and write out all the pros and cons of our marriage. I started writing and low and behold the pros far outnumbered the cons. I felt ashamed of myself. He really is a wonderful husband and for the most part is very thoughtful.

I once read that we tend to want our “mate” to be more like ourselves. But that if we actually had someone exactly like us, we would be very unhappy and bored to tears.

I also read that another big problem is that we tend to want someone to “complete” us. This does not work. We should be complete. A healthy relationship is when each person is totally complete and wants a mate that can walk side by side with them along the roadways of life.

How about a relationship where one person wants someone to “make them happy.” I  have seen this over and over. You cannot depend on another to make you happy. That is much too much of a burden on the other person.You need to be able to make yourself happy.

I also had a friend tell me he felt his wife was his “possession” just like his car was his possession. Ouch! I thought to myself, “I am certainly glad you are not my husband.”

I have seen couples that fought all the time while they were dating. They eventually got married saying that they felt marriage would solve their problems. Well, guess what? I knew that was a disaster waiting to happen. They ended up getting a divorce. The same thing with a couple thinking that if they had a child it would solve their marital problems. This, again, is a big mistake.

I am well aware that it takes all kinds to make a good, solid, healthy relationship. And before I forget it, couples need to discuss things more. So conversation is important as well as compromise. Healthy relationships don’t just happen, it does take work. But I hope I have given someone out there some food for thought.

Before I sign off, I have to tell you a funny thing I heard one time and that is that females don’t know what they want but they get mad as hell if you don’t give it to them! Males of the world, I know you love that. I’m not sure I agree with that, but I thought I’d sign off with something funny.

What do you think readers?